Listen.. that's all I ask..
This morning during our lecture, may binigay na handout samin na isang poem..
Listen
and you start giving advice
you have not done what i asked
and you begin to tell me why i shouldn't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings
and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem,
then you have failed me, strange as that may seem
not talk or do - just hear me
Advice is cheap : 10 cents will get you both Dear Abby and
Billy Graham in the same newspaper.
And i can do for myself; i am not helpless,
maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless..
you contribute to my fear and weakness
no matter how irrational, then i can quit trying to convince you
and get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling
And when that's clear, the answers are obvious and i don't need advice
Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them
because God is mute and He doesn't give advice or try to fix things.
He just listens and let you work it out for yourself.
wait a minute for your turn; and i'll listen to you
These past weeks kc, we were in the oncology unit.. Most of the patients there e matatagal na dun sa unit.. prang hinihintay nlng nila ang kanilang oras.. may mga depressed, my mga on denial, at may iba nmn na accepted na nila ang magiging fate nila.. nakakaawa ngang tingnan ang mga pasyente nmin eh.. last week pa nmn, isa sa mga naassign sakin eh totally depressed na babae.. she's a caucasian female in her 60's and she is diagnosed with breast cancer, na nagmetastasize na sa kanyang bone and colon.. tpos marami pa cyang medical history na nagpapacomplicate sa kanyang situation.. suka cya ng suka ng green color khit na hindi nmn cya kumain ng breakfast nya dat day.. pra dw ung lumabas eh ung kinain nya pa the previous days.. sabi ng doktor nga eh kya ganon dw kc obstructed daw ung colon nya dhil nga sa tumor, that's why she's constipated.. hindi lumalabas ung feces (tae) kya naiipon lng sa loob ng katawan.. kung hindi un tatanggalin eh maiimpeksyon cya.. can u imagine, it's been 5 days na dw cya hindi dumudumi?? tpos marami pa daw masakit sa kanyang katawan, plus iba pa ung emotional pain that she's going through..
I tried to comfort her kaso she really was feeling so down and tlgang natatakot cya.. and then she started to cry!! ay grabe.. i was speechless nga nung una eh.. tpos nauutal ako ng onti coz i'm not sure what to say.. i cant tell her nmn na 'everything will be ok" kc it's like giving them false reassurance (which is one thing na tinuturo sa skul na iwasang sabihin).. and i saw in her face na sabik cya na may kausap so i stayed with her khit time na lunch break nmn.. dun ko nadiskubre na andaming masasalimuot na pangyayari sa buhay nya pla na nag-aadd up sa kanyang depression.. just to give you an idea, she was repeatedly raped by her step brother and the brother of her so-called friend, she became pregnant and had a child after one of those rapes,, she had 20 abortions, she just recently discovered after her mother's death this yr that she was an unwanted child and ung tatay na kinikilala nya e hindi pala un ang kanyang biological father.. her boyfriend nya dw ngayon (oo, tama nabasa mo! boyfriend at hindi asawa) eh tinetake cya for granted that he's not even visiting her sa hospital.. pinupuntahan lng kung may kelangan na pera.. and so on and so forth... basta marami tlga..
i just listened.. i sat at her bedside and held her hand at hinayaan ko lng cyang umiyak doon.. she needs to let it all out.. i may not be able to cure her or take away all the pain she's been through, but at least i could listen to her.. feeling nya kc she's so neglected eh.. so hindi ko cya iniwanan khit na ung tiyan ko eh nagrereklamo na at gutom narin.. it's past lunchtime na un kc and I was there since 6:45am..
Pagkatapos kong basahin ung poem knina, naalala ko tuloy ung psyente ko last week.. Tama lng pala ung ginawa ko.. i used silence and therapeautic touch as my means of communication.. o diba!! naalala ko rin kc ung sabi nga ng mga professor ko, if there comes a time na hindi mo alam kung ano sasabihin mo sa iyong pasyente , tumahimik k nlng at hayaan mong ilabas ng pasyente mo ang kanyang nararamdaman.. and to be honest, I felt good after our duty noon. I felt I made a difference, no matter how small it may be.
Sabi nga ng friend kong si Mark, hindi nya daw kaya yung ganon. Too depressing dw to handle. May point cya..You see people at their worst, hoping that somehow you could help them out in their weakest state.. Mahirap talaga kung tutuusin.
I may just spend just a few hours with my patients but a few hours could teach you so much about life's lability, and how fragile, precious, and fleeting it is. Minsan nga iniisip ko, is it really us who is making a difference in their lives, or them making a difference in ours. Gets?
Listen
When i asked you to listen to me
and you start giving advice
you have not done what i asked
When i asked you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why i shouldn't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings
When i asked you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem,
then you have failed me, strange as that may seem
Listen!! all i asked was that you listen,
not talk or do - just hear me
Advice is cheap : 10 cents will get you both Dear Abby and
Billy Graham in the same newspaper.
And i can do for myself; i am not helpless,
maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless..
When you do something for me that i can and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and weakness
But when you accept as a simple fact that i do feel what i feel,
no matter how irrational, then i can quit trying to convince you
and get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling
And when that's clear, the answers are obvious and i don't need advice
Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them
Perhaps that's why prayer works, sometimes, for some people
because God is mute and He doesn't give advice or try to fix things.
He just listens and let you work it out for yourself.
So please listen and just hear me. And , if you want to talk
wait a minute for your turn; and i'll listen to you
-anonymous-
These past weeks kc, we were in the oncology unit.. Most of the patients there e matatagal na dun sa unit.. prang hinihintay nlng nila ang kanilang oras.. may mga depressed, my mga on denial, at may iba nmn na accepted na nila ang magiging fate nila.. nakakaawa ngang tingnan ang mga pasyente nmin eh.. last week pa nmn, isa sa mga naassign sakin eh totally depressed na babae.. she's a caucasian female in her 60's and she is diagnosed with breast cancer, na nagmetastasize na sa kanyang bone and colon.. tpos marami pa cyang medical history na nagpapacomplicate sa kanyang situation.. suka cya ng suka ng green color khit na hindi nmn cya kumain ng breakfast nya dat day.. pra dw ung lumabas eh ung kinain nya pa the previous days.. sabi ng doktor nga eh kya ganon dw kc obstructed daw ung colon nya dhil nga sa tumor, that's why she's constipated.. hindi lumalabas ung feces (tae) kya naiipon lng sa loob ng katawan.. kung hindi un tatanggalin eh maiimpeksyon cya.. can u imagine, it's been 5 days na dw cya hindi dumudumi?? tpos marami pa daw masakit sa kanyang katawan, plus iba pa ung emotional pain that she's going through..
I tried to comfort her kaso she really was feeling so down and tlgang natatakot cya.. and then she started to cry!! ay grabe.. i was speechless nga nung una eh.. tpos nauutal ako ng onti coz i'm not sure what to say.. i cant tell her nmn na 'everything will be ok" kc it's like giving them false reassurance (which is one thing na tinuturo sa skul na iwasang sabihin).. and i saw in her face na sabik cya na may kausap so i stayed with her khit time na lunch break nmn.. dun ko nadiskubre na andaming masasalimuot na pangyayari sa buhay nya pla na nag-aadd up sa kanyang depression.. just to give you an idea, she was repeatedly raped by her step brother and the brother of her so-called friend, she became pregnant and had a child after one of those rapes,, she had 20 abortions, she just recently discovered after her mother's death this yr that she was an unwanted child and ung tatay na kinikilala nya e hindi pala un ang kanyang biological father.. her boyfriend nya dw ngayon (oo, tama nabasa mo! boyfriend at hindi asawa) eh tinetake cya for granted that he's not even visiting her sa hospital.. pinupuntahan lng kung may kelangan na pera.. and so on and so forth... basta marami tlga..
i just listened.. i sat at her bedside and held her hand at hinayaan ko lng cyang umiyak doon.. she needs to let it all out.. i may not be able to cure her or take away all the pain she's been through, but at least i could listen to her.. feeling nya kc she's so neglected eh.. so hindi ko cya iniwanan khit na ung tiyan ko eh nagrereklamo na at gutom narin.. it's past lunchtime na un kc and I was there since 6:45am..
Pagkatapos kong basahin ung poem knina, naalala ko tuloy ung psyente ko last week.. Tama lng pala ung ginawa ko.. i used silence and therapeautic touch as my means of communication.. o diba!! naalala ko rin kc ung sabi nga ng mga professor ko, if there comes a time na hindi mo alam kung ano sasabihin mo sa iyong pasyente , tumahimik k nlng at hayaan mong ilabas ng pasyente mo ang kanyang nararamdaman.. and to be honest, I felt good after our duty noon. I felt I made a difference, no matter how small it may be.
Sabi nga ng friend kong si Mark, hindi nya daw kaya yung ganon. Too depressing dw to handle. May point cya..You see people at their worst, hoping that somehow you could help them out in their weakest state.. Mahirap talaga kung tutuusin.
I may just spend just a few hours with my patients but a few hours could teach you so much about life's lability, and how fragile, precious, and fleeting it is. Minsan nga iniisip ko, is it really us who is making a difference in their lives, or them making a difference in ours. Gets?
inspire me.. stalk me..
.. unsilenced at 04:40 pm
~cee _ jay~
~cee _ jay~
